Jamie's Cafe

       When you live in a small town and have no coffee shops to study at sometimes you make coffee in the evening, turn on a relaxing pandora station, and pretend to be in a coffee shop while you do your Bible study. :) It was actually really enjoyable! I don't know about you, but when I'm studying the Bible I get distracted very easily. Usually I'm distracted by any mess around me and then all I can think about is how I need to clean. ... Unfortunately my house usually is somewhat messy. I've gotten better, but at the moment I have a project that has taken over my living room. So last night I moved from my comfy chair to my dining room table to do my Bible study. Currently my dining room table is the cleanest part of my house. It really helped me stay focused. It helped to not be surrounded by a mess. It also meant that I could spread out my books and not have to juggle them on my lap. Why didn't I do this sooner? Sometimes I'm a slow learner.
       After the couple weeks of no tv and really focusing on God's Word I'm amazed at how easily I fall back into old habits. I watched a bunch of tv over the weekend, granted I was working on a project while I was watching. But I had to work really hard on Monday and Tuesday to not allow myself to continue that habit. I watched one show last night while I was cooking and eating dinner and then I turned the tv off. It felt good to do that. As long as I stay disciplined with the tv (and internet surfing) I can watch it during the week. I just need to not let it take over my evening.
       I'm still so excited about all that God is teaching me through my Bible study and time in the Word right now. I want my life to be saturated in God's Word! Throughout my life I've been encouraged to do this by various sources (church, school, family, friends), but I've never actually done it. Again...slow learner. It will be exciting to see how God uses me as I continue to grow closer to Him!

Feeling so blessed!

I'm so thankful for the people God has put in my life! Recently I've noticed how surrounded (both local and long distance) I am by people who encourage me in my walk with the Lord. People who share what they are learning and get excited with me over what I am learning. My list of books to read is growing because of recommendations by these friends and I've felt so encouraged lately to dive deeper into Scripture. God is so good!

Another one bites the dust!

I get a lot of emails throughout the day. And most of them I delete right away, but these emails are THE BEST!!! This is the 2nd email I've gotten like this and I have several more to go. But let me tell you there is a happy dance going on right now...well on the inside. :) 

Thank you Lord for helping me get through this long period of debt. Please help me to be diligent as I continue to pay off these student loans. 

Fasting from Sleep {Yes, I Said Sleep}

Anyone else get completely thrown off by the time change yesterday?

       Last night was awful! I could not go to sleep! I'm sure it wasn't just the time change because I was up until close to 2am. Yuck! I was just about the grab my computer and turn on Netflix when I finally fell asleep. I try not to, but sometimes having a tv show on helps me relax so I can fall asleep. Thankfully I didn't have to do that. I took a nap after work because I was just so exhausted. Hoping that doesn't mess up my sleep tonight. I'm seriously considering taking a benedryl tonight to make sure I sleep!
       Not the best way to start the week. Thankfully my kiddos were really good and after lunch when I told them how tired I was they were extra good. I really am so blessed to have these kids in my class. They are a very compassionate group.
       The lack of sleep made my time this morning in the Word and prayer a little...wanting. I did it, but I'm not sure that I even remember anything I read and my prayer consisted of asking the Lord for the strength to make it through the day. And He answered my prayer. I made it through. My students learned new things and got their work done and we had a great discussion during our Bible time in the morning devotion and afternoon Bible lesson.

Anyway, that wasn't why I came on here to write tonight.
SQUIRREL!

       Yesterday's message at church was so good.

       Like I said last week my pastor is going through a series on Lent. Lent not as a tradition or a way to change habits, but to prepare our hearts for Easter and celebrating Jesus' Resurrection. Last week He encouraged us to fast from a form of food for the week. I didn't. Instead I fasted from TV. Probably the best decision I've ever made. As I wrote last night, last week my passion for Christ and His Word really blossomed and I'm so excited to grow closer to Him. Even though Lent isn't meant to be for lifestyle changes I feel like it has opened my eyes to a change that I need to make in my life.

       This week our music pastor taught on fasting from sleep. Literally there was an audible gasp in the room when he said that.

       My initial thought was, you've got to be kidding me! I need sleep! I won't be able to function! {clearly God proved me wrong about that since I didn't sleep much last night and I made it through the day with His help} He didn't stop there. He wasn't meaning that we shouldn't sleep, but we need to take a period of our sleep time to spend praying. Fasting from food and sleep are two things Christ did while He was here on earth in order to spend time alone with the Father. My pastor suggested getting up 30 min earlier and staying up 30 min later to spend time in prayer.
       I tend to write my prayers in a journal in the morning when I have my quiet time and that does not take 30 min. 30 minutes is a long time! I think I spent almost 15 minutes praying before I went to bed last night and it was a sweet time of prayer. I prayed over my fears, my family, friends, people who need the Lord, and praised the Lord for what He is doing in my life. By the end of that time I was in tears just so blessed that the God who created the entire universe would listen to me and hear me. I do not deserve that from Him, but He does anyway.

       I'm looking forward to the time in prayer I'll have tonight. I'm so excited with how God is growing me right now!

No TV...what a blessing!

Words I never dreamed of writing in my planner suddenly appeared there this week! I've always said I watch way too much tv. And then I'd justify how much I watch by saying I just use it as noise while I get work done. Well...sometimes that is true. But more often than not it starts that way and then I sit and watch show after show without getting anything else done. 

So, did I survive my week of fasting from tv? 

Yes! I most definitely did! 

       God gave me such an incredible week filled with Him. Instead of walking through the door after work and turning on the tv I turned on a podcast of a sermon. And as I listened I did things around my house and made dinner. Later I spent time reading a book a friend and I started reading together that I was way behind on (because of tv), reading Scripture, praying, working through my Bible study (which I don't usually complete because I run out of time...my own fault), and reading another book I've been reading for fun. 

       I'll be honest in telling you that some evenings it was really hard. If I felt bored I really wanted to watch tv. Instead I turned on Pandora and read or got busy doing something else. I even met my goal of using my treadmill 3 times this week! 

       I had to be careful not to allow my time on the computer to just fill my tv time. Tuesday last week I found myself doing that and made myself stop. 

       I was so blessed by all the Lord taught me over the week. My focus on Him became so strong and I feel like I love spending time with Him even more. 

       This new week is going to look a little different. This morning in church we were challenged to fast in a different way as a church body so I'm going to do that which I'll post about tomorrow. But I really want to make a long term change in how I spend my time. This week I plan on saving tv time for the weekend and along with that I'm not going to allow myself to binge watch a show. An episode or two and then do something I need to do. I want to continue feeling this joy I have over spending time with the Lord! 

Expect to Hear His Voice

Oh wow! God's timing is amazing...surprise surprise {sarcasm}

Yesterday was a struggle for me. Was having anxiety over something that I've been struggling with for...a long time. I was mad at myself and questioning why God is having me go through this. Not going to get into the details right now, sorry.

But anyway, last night I started a new Bible study at a woman's home whom my mom grew up with and I now go to church with. I went to that study hoping it would be a good one for me, but not knowing anything about it other than it was by Pricilla Shirer. Also went in hopes of asking my host if we could get together sometime to talk about the thing I'm struggling with.

The initial video was good and I left feeling that this would be a good study and I now have the number of my host so we can plan a time to get together.

All good.

Little did I know how God was going to touch my life just on day 1 of the homework for this study. He knew all along that this would be the perfect time for me to hear this.

The study is called "Discerning the Voice of God."
Week 1: Anticipating the Voice of God
Day 1: Expect to hear it

"When the circumstances of life seem to be closing in on us and we see no end in sight, we want to know how long we will have to continue calling out to God with seemingly no response. We also want to know why He would continue to allow the circumstances we face"

Yeah, that is exactly how I was feeling yesterday afternoon.
The lesson talks about Habakkuk and how he cried out to the Lord and then later the confidence he had in what the Lord was doing.

"While Habakkuk waited on god to answer, God was already answering...even though the prophet wasn't seeing God respond in the way and timing he expected, God was speaking and moving. He always is--even in His silence."

I was to make a list of circumstances that are troubling me currently and then take deliberate time this week to see God's handiwork in each of them.

"If we come to Him doubting His ability to speak, we will have a difficult time listening. So we must come expectantly" -- Charles Stanley

I'm not sure yet what God is doing through this situation I'm going through right now, but I need to remember that He is always speaking and moving and I need to trust Him even when I can't see the process. I need to put aside my doubts that things will ever change and listen.

Fasting for a Week

I've decided that I need to write on here every Sunday. If nothing else than to recap on what I learned in Church in the morning. So often I go to church, take notes, and forget what I've learned within a few hours. That's not good. It's good to have someone ask me what the sermon was about, but I don't always have that. So I'm going to write about it to keep the message fresh on my mind.

This morning my pastor talked about Lent and fasting. He asked the congregation to raise their hands if they have ever practiced Lent. About half of the people raised their hands. I didn't grow up practicing Lent. I honestly didn't know anything about it. And when I did finally learn about it in high school or college (not sure when) I just thought it was something Catholics practiced. Maybe it is more prominent in the Catholic church, but that doesn't mean it isn't something I could do. If I understand correctly essentially Lent in fasting. It is giving up something to focus on something of greater value. And what is the thing of greatest value we should be focusing on? Christ! It is so easy to let things take the place of Christ in our lives.
I know I could spend more time focusing on prayer, Scripture, and time with Christ. The problem I have is that I get home from work and turn on my tv. I even sit watching tv thinking about how I should be reading my Bible instead or listening to a sermon or something. And yet there I sit with my eyes on the tv.
Can you see where this is going?
Yes, I need to turn off my tv for a period of time.
And instead of watching tv I'm going to fill that time with things that will help me grow in my walk with the Lord.

• Listen to sermons on podcasts
• Dig deep into Scripture
• Continue reading the Christian living book I started a long time ago
• Complete my Bible study homework for the week
• Spend time in prayer

Doesn't that sound good?! It actually really sounds good to me. The thing that makes me nervous is that I'm notorious for getting excited about something like this and then after a day or so it fizzles out and I give up. But I totally feel convicted about doing this. 

So...starting first thing tomorrow I will not be watching tv until the following Monday. Not even the news in the morning. I look forward to reporting on how it goes. But I especially look forward to seeing what God has for me to learn through this experience. 

Debt

It's been a while since I've posted anything. Life has been busy! And even now I'm not sure what I should write about.

So let's be real here. I may be feeling too tired and emotional to be writing right now.
What am I doing right now? I'm sitting watching tv trying to figure out how to make more money. I'm so tired of being in debt. I may not think about it all the time, but it is like I'm dragging around this heavy weight on my back and it doesn't feel like it is getting any lighter. Yes, I'm plugging away at it, but it is a little discouraging at times.

What am I supposed to do? I'm not good at selling things. I tried selling Tastefully Simple and it didn't go well. I'm not a good enough writer to blog and make money. I would be way too self-conscious to have a youtube channel. I'm crafty, but not original enough to sell stuff on etsy. Looked into teaching driver's ed, but I think more would go into it than I have the time or resources to do it.

Blech...

...Ok, now that I've slept and am feeling rested let me continue on a better note.
Looked over my student loans last night. 2 of them are within reach of paying off probably within the next 6 months if I work hard at saving. And I didn't realize that I now have 2 that are completely paid off!! yay! The remaining loans are big ones so they will take longer, but once the little ones are done I'll be able to pay more off of the big ones.

I wish it could be something that happens quickly, but in reality it will take me a while. With the Lord's help I know I can do it!

Looking forward to the day when I am debt free!!